


Dolphin Heist

by thursjournal



Category: Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: M/M, no actual dolphin sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-13
Updated: 2015-07-13
Packaged: 2018-04-09 02:16:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4329930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thursjournal/pseuds/thursjournal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Since when?" John asked, following him.</p><p>Sherlock moved determinedly around the kitchen with the pretext of making tea.</p><p>"Since the aquarium case," he mumbled, staring at the kettle.</p><p>"So you have, what, a thing for dolphins now?" John asked incredulously.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dolphin Heist

**Author's Note:**

> This is 100% the fault of cakepopsforeveryone, who requested johnlock dolphin sex. This is probably not what she had in mind.

"Sherlock!" John yelled, pounding on the loo door, "Where's my laptop? I'm late for the clinic."

"On my bed," Sherlock called over the sound of running water.

John pushed the bedroom door open. His laptop sat open on the unmade bed alongside a tin of half eaten biscuits and what looked like one of John's jumpers...with the sleeve unraveled.

"At least you bothered to charge it," John grumbled as he lowered himself to the floor and wrestled the power cord from the outlet. As he pulled the charger from under the bed it brought a jumble of detritus with it. Test tubes, a physics journal, one of Mrs. Hudson's doilies (slightly burnt), and something that stood out even in the odd assortment of 'things that can be found under Sherlock's bed.'

John pulled the bright blue cylinder from the pile. It was long and thin, with the distinctive smell of silicone, and one end tapered into the shape of a smiling dolphin head. As John stared at it in disbelief, Sherlock appeared in the doorway. In two quick steps he closed the distance between them and snatched the thing from John's hand. He crammed it in a dresser drawer and slammed the drawer shut. John tilted his head with a crooked smile. 

"What," he motioned towards the drawer, "is that?"

Sherlock's face was nonchalant but a blush slowly crept up his neck. 

"It's to do with sex," he said in a perfect mimicry of Mycroft. 

"I know what it is," John said, "but what are you doing with it?"

Sherlock sighed, "What do people usually do with such things."

"Yeah," John replied, "but what are _you_ doing with it?"

Sherlock cast an exasperated look at John and strode out of the room. 

"Since when?" John asked, following him.

Sherlock moved determinedly around the kitchen with the pretext of making tea. 

"Since the aquarium case," he mumbled, staring at the kettle.

"So you have, what, a thing for dolphins now?" John asked incredulously. He glanced at the computer in his hand and suddenly his face contorted, "Oh God, is there dolphin porn on my laptop?"

"I assure you John, my proclivities do not include beastiality," Sherlock said as he poured the tea. "After the dolphin heist, the thief sent it to me as a...lark, I suppose. Said he wished he could shove that bloody dolphin up my 'skinny arse' but this would have to do. Seemed a shame for it to go to waste, regardless of the original intent."

Sherlock carried his tea to the couch and buried his face in the newspaper. He heard the sound of John packing his laptop into its bag and putting on his jacket.

"That dolphin from the heist was tough to recover," John said lightly.

Sherlock lowered the paper. "Indeed. It took six people to load it and one man got a broken rib for his effort."

"Hmmm," John hummed, "dangerous animals."

Sherlock eyed him closely.

"Well," John said, shouldering his bag, "if you need a hand with your, uh, dolphin just...let me know." 

He nodded once and then headed down the stairs. Sherlock stared after him and then slowly steepled his fingers under his chin. When he finally roused from his reverie an hour later he dug out his phone and typed out a text. His mouth curled into a smile and he tapped a second message. Sherlock pocketed his phone and leaned back on the couch.

 _Dolphin heist @ 221B, come if convenient -SH_

_Could be dangerous -SH_


End file.
